Start by reviewing this week’s key points from the message.
Four Qualities To Develop and Look For
"Become the person the person you're looking for is looking for." Andy Stanley
1. Godly Character.
Song of Solomon 1:2-3
2. Growing Trust.
Song of Solomon 1:5-6
3. Higher Standards.
Song of Solomon 1:7
"You can choose to sin together or honor God together."
4. Consistent Encouragement
Song of Solomon 1:9
Song of Solomon 1:15-16
1. She feels special.
Song of Solomon 2:1
2. She feels secure.
Song of Solomon 2:3
Song of Solomon 2:5-6
How can you best facilitate discussion that will be engaging for everyone? Choose from these suggestions to lead each person in your group to own their own growth.
- What are some funny and misleading descriptions you’ve heard of from online dating profiles or blind date set-ups?
- What qualities does our culture say attraction is built upon? What issues might be caused by people using those worldly qualities as a basis for a relationship?
- What one area will you work on developing in yourself to be someone who helps those you love feel special and secure?
- Which quality is the most important for you in a relationship — including friends and family? Why is that so important to you?
- Share a time when someone made you feel special and secure. What did they do to make you feel that way?
- How are you working on developing the qualities you’d like to see in someone else in your own life?
- Talk about whether you think it's more important to work on these qualities so you'll attract a spouse or so you'll attract others to Christ working in and through you?
- Do you spend more time looking for these qualities or developing them? What changes could help you become the kind of person the person you’re looking for is looking for?
- Does the idea of marriage appeal to you? Why or why not?
For Married Couples
- How are you cultivating and improving attraction between you and your spouse?
- What are some past insecurities your spouse has loved away?
- Choose one quality you can work on as a couple. What could you do to develop that in your relationship?
- Share an example of a marriage you admire. What have you observed that couple doing that works?
Live It Out
End with a challenge to take action. Lead your group to help each person identify their next steps.
- You can’t change someone else. You can only change you. What will you do this week to develop these four qualities?
- How can our group support each other’s closest relationships?